Fine Food, Festive Atmosphere Draws Speed Daters

By Nancy K. Crevier

Their own romance was more of a slow burn, but Litchfield Saltwater Grille owners Brett and Chef Albert Clugston III are setting fire to the dating scene in Connecticut. Beginning in late 2008, the couple — married just one year, but business partners for the last 2½ years and friends for several years before that — opened the doors of their northwestern Connecticut seafood restaurant and wine bar to monthly speed dating events, a social gathering in which singles meet for several minutes-long dates in one afternoon.

Speed dating originated in Los Angeles in 1998, the creation of Rabbi Yaacov Deyo to help young Jewish singles connect. In its original guise, speed dating consisted of an event in which seven, seven-minute meetings between men and women took place. Those who expressed mutual interest in meeting further were matched up by the event host later and provided with contact information.

The popularity of the idea has spread across the nation and throughout all cultures since then, varying somewhat from region to region.

The Clugstons have discovered that the monthly speed dating at their upscale fish house is a big hit among unattached men and women seeking relationships, but who do not want to waste time or who do not always have time to invest in evening-long first dates that frequently turn out to be last dates.

The Grille events have attracted participants from towns all over Connecticut, said Ms Clugston, including her hometown of Newtown.

“A customer gave me the idea for doing the speed dating events,” she said, “and it is amazingly successful.” Having lived in Los Angeles and New York City, she knew of speed dating events, but they were primarily geared for singles in their 30s. “It’s a new thing in this region, though, and a lot of the people around here are older,” said Ms Clugston, so the crowd she draws is more mature. Over 100 men and women, most in their 50s and 60s, and all over 40 years of age, have attended each event. Because more women than men register for the afternoons of fine food, drink, and socialization, the Grille has had to turn away nearly 50 women each month.

“I haven’t even advertised,” said Ms Clugston. “I sent out one email for the second event and the phone is ringing off the hook all week long.” Friend tell friends, and even sign up friends, she said.

The event begins at 11:30 on a Sunday morning. Speed Daters pay $32 to take part in a 90-minute casual mingling time that includes a full buffet, drinks, and live music, plus another two hours of four-minute dates. “Mixers” who do not want to take part in speed dating can pay $20 to enjoy the social activities from 11:30 to 1 pm.

“It requires major facilitation,” said Ms Clugston. With her husband running the kitchen, she is grateful for the assistance of her parents, Albe and Daryl Galotta of Newtown. The Galottas are no strangers to facilitating events. For 19 years, they owned and operated Greenwoods (now the Opera House Café) in Bethel, until retiring five years ago. The couple is partners, along with the Clugstons, in Litchfield Saltwater Grille.

“My dad is great. The women who come to the speed dating events just love him,” said Ms Clugston. “He plays a crucial part in moving these events along smoothly,” she said.

Each speed dating participant is provided with a personal match card and the names of his or her “dates” at the start of the event. As the men and women go through the micro-moments, each person marks a scorecard with a yes or no by each name.

“If you have put a Yes next to someone who has also put a Yes to you, that’s a match,” explained Ms Clugston. Following the event, participants receive the names and contact information for the people with whom they matched.

“That is what takes a lot of time for me,” said Ms Clugston. She also provides participants with statistics about the event, such as how many positive matches were made, or how many people liked a certain individual. “I’ve found that a lot of people do this just for the ego boost, not just for dates,” she said.

Confirming registrations can also take up a good part of the week, as it is important that an equal number of men and women commit to the afternoon. “Men are more hesitant than women about speed dating, so they sometimes need a personal phone call from me,” she said. She also fields phone calls during the week to soothe nervous first timers and to answer questions.

What makes speed dating events at Litchfield Saltwater Grille stand out, said Ms Clugston, is the food and wine. “Even if you don’t find someone, people love the food.”

A special theme is paired with cuisine and drinks to create a fun environment. In February, the theme was “Stop Whining About Not Having a Date for Valentine’s Day and Come to our Speed Dating Event for Winos.” A wine, chocolate and cheese pairing accompanied the speed dating event that day.

A “Spring Fling Singles Mixer” is next on the schedule, Sunday, March 22, and will feature a Mexican fajita station, said Albert Clugston, including fish, chicken, and steak fajitas and peppers, onions, traditional sauces and salsas, and white corn tortillas made on premises. Mini-burgers with all of the fixings will be offered at another food station, served on petite brioche button rolls.

Warmer spring weather will find the patio off of the main dining room open, and on April 19 the restaurant will host a “New Orleans Jazz Brunch Singles Mixer.” Alligator sausage, frog legs, crawfish, and two kinds of gumbo, as well as honey jalapeño corn bread will be featured. The zesty fare can be washed down with icy cold bottles of beer from the beer tub or a cool mint julep. Wine lovers can always choose from wines suggested by the Clugstons or from the extensive list of exclusively American wines that Ms Clugston, a sommelier, has designed, and non-alcoholic beverages are always available.

“From the food side, you’re not going to find this kind of food at this kind of event anywhere else,” Mr Clugston said. “The status quo is great food here.” He also noted that for many in the crowd, the speed dating afternoons are a chance to dress up and socialize in a nice atmosphere.

“It doesn’t necessarily have to be about dating,” agreed Linda Barnes of Winchester Center. She attended the February event and looks forward to attending others as a “mixer” rather than a dater. Cecilia Kuhn of Winsted, who attended in February as a “mixer” found the afternoon extremely enjoyable as well.

“It was great. I had conversation with a lot of very nice people. Everybody just wants to say Hello,” said Ms Kuhn.

“People have been very respectful. The thing is,” said Ms Clugston, “you know that somebody will listen to you talk for four minutes. You’re almost guaranteed a friendly encounter.”

The atmosphere is festive and fun, said the Clugstons, and they look forward to welcoming new participants each month. To register for a Speed Dating event at Litchfield Saltwater Grille, call 860-567-4900 or e-mail swgcorporate@optonline.net. Detailed information about the restaurant and the speed dating programs is available at LitchfieldSaltwaterGrille.com.