It’s Important—

Family Support Means Everything

By Kendra Bobowick

Who: State Representative Chris Lyddy.

What is Important to him: Family.

When first contemplating what was important to him, Chris Lyddy said, “At first, I missed the point.” He initially thought about social problems, or things that were wrong.

“I came up with a list … it was doom and gloom,” he said. “So, then I thought, what do I have?” Answering himself, he said, “Faith, family, and friends. Those three things I have today, every day, and will always have.

“Is it cliché? Faith, family, and friends — after pondering those three things, I am proud to have them; happy to have them. They are the pillars that hold me up.”

Certain things “bring light to the dark,” he said. Family, faith and friends “keep my darkness light.” Crossing the room to reach for a photo over the fireplace, he looks at a group of familiar faces that smile back, family members he points to by name.

“This is my team,” he explained. Naming a cousin, a sister, and other relatives in the group, he said, “They give me the momentum I need to do the things I do.”

Thinking of his childhood around the dinner table, arguments, struggles, and eventual accomplishments with college, graduate school and a career, Mr Lyddy explained that family is “what remains, what’s left if the cookie crumbles.” His family is a foundation for him, emotional support, a wealth of lessons.

“We grew up here, played sports, shared dinner conversations, became friends. I don’t know where I’d be without them.” He is one of five siblings.

Moving to the corner he lifts a picture of his grandmother, telling stories from time he spent with her when he was young.

“We spent every summer at Fairfield Beach. Imagine all of us down there at the water and how nerve-wracking that can be for a [grandparent].” He was not even sure his grandmother could swim, but she was the self-appointed lifeguard. Already in the water, he said, “We were moving farther and farther from shore, and then there she was in the water yelling, ‘Move back in, move back in!’ And, being kids the kids that we were, we went farther and would wave, ‘Hi grandma!’”

He wonders what people thought as she yelled for him to come back. Was he a rotten kid? He laughed. “We drove her nuts, but she loved us.”

Most important is the picture he has of his late father who died in 2006 of cancer, but not before leaving a permanent impressions on his son.

“He is my hero. He was my spiritual advisor as well and encouraged conversations about religion and would talk with me about it.” Remembering his father privately for a moment, Mr Lyddy then said, “He loved his family and his church and I keep him by my side all the time, that’s for sure.”

He became friends with his brothers and sisters, he said, at the dinner table.

Imagine five kids, two parents, all at the table filled with laughter screams, tears, you name it. There are times we fought or laughed so hard we would get kicked out, tears streaming down our faces. Those relationships are so important … they’ll remain my best friends regardless of who else comes into my life.”

At one point, Mr Lyddy faced the prospect of graduate school but was torn by the desire to remain home when his father was sick. His parents had a different feeling.

“We worked too hard for you to come home,” they had told him. He went to graduate school.

The lessons and support “changed my life forever.” He recalls the phone conversations from school to home, his parents’ insistence that he continue. He did. Prompted by a request for an interview with The Bee, he found a letter his mother had written to him the day his parents dropped him off at graduate school. As he and his father unpacked the car, she wrote him a note of encouragement and stashed it in one of his bags. Discovering the note after they had gone, he said, “This was my token to go. It was okay to go.”

Folding his hands, Mr Lyddy explained that at one point his father’s prospects were grim.

“He [was told he had] only had three months to live.” His father exceeded that timeframe “four times over,” he said.

Finishing the school year, Mr Lyddy made it home to see his father and talk about life, faith, and family.

See the related video at NewtownBee.com.

(The Bee series It’s Important includes a brief interview and video revealing — one person, one idea at a time — what is important to you. Be a part of It’s Important. Contact Kendra at 426-3141 or reach her at Kendra@thebee.com. Go to NewtownBee.com to see It’s Important.)