After the tercentennial beard-judging contest at Naser’s salon on Sunday, a couple of the hirsute fellows gathered at Ham Brosious’s house for a shave-off dinner party. Peter Marshall had won third place for his full beard, so Ham — whose Captain Ahab beard didn’t garner any awards — quipped that the judge obviously went for “quantity, not quality.” Before the two shaved off their beards, Neil Johnson read a poem that he had composed especially for the event:

  Let’s offer up a silent prayer

for those who grew their facial hair.

  Full on the heels of their decision

came some support and some derision.

  They turned not cross, and stayed not crabby

when called as Ahab or as Gabby.

  Toward razor’s edge they were not budging

until they faced the final judging.

  Their months of stern determination

now end with some mild trepidation.

  For in their minds the question raises

will friends and family like their faces?

Everyone I know likes Dr Bob Grossman’s friendly bearded face — even dolphins. Ever since Dr Bob stepped back from the operating table, he’s been stepping into all sorts of adventures. His latest exotic endeavor was brief stint as a dolphin-whisperer in Cozumel last week.

Dr Bob was in Mexico on a cruise with his wife, Annamae, and he reports that his encounter with the friendly, intelligent, and athletic dolphins was truly amazing.

The eagle has landed…er, hatched! On Saturday morning, April 9, the single egg being incubated by the Barton Island American bald eagles cracked open and out flopped a fluffy white eaglet crying for food. The parents are dutifully bringing lots of shredded fish bits to their hatchling, and one or the other of them continues to protect it from cold spring days and nights under its breast feathers. The Northeast Utilities videocamera trained on the eagles’ nest is well-hidden, but a steady stream of live pictures continues to flow across cyberspace meaning we can watch the eaglet grow and eventually fledge sometime in July. Log on to www.nu.com/eagles to see the show.

Bethel sculptor Jack Rudolf, who has exhibited many of his heroic sculptures of sports figures and historic characters in the Cyrenius Booth Library, has been honored in the selection of his latest work to be shown at the Mark Twain House in West Hartford. The bonded bronze bust of –– you guessed it –– Mark Twain is at the foundry right now, Jack says, and replicas will be placed for sale in the house’s gift shop. “I’d like to put the original in the Booth Library on temporary exhibit when I get it back,” he adds, “especially since Newtown residents have always been so appreciative of my work.”

Newtown Trails Leader Pat Barkman was delighted with the turnout and the work ethic demonstrated by all those who showed up to blaze and improve the Rocky Glen portion of Al’s Trail last Saturday. “We had a great day on the trail with 19 people turning out. All knew what to do, worked hard, and got a lot accomplished. We met at Subway after and Leon [Barkman] treated us all to lunch.” Last we heard, Saturday was Leon’s birthday. Seems like in this case, the birthday boy should have been the treatee.

Finally, if April showers have you twiddling your thumbs, here’s something fun to do. Set out a piece of pie on a plate in front of each of your family members. What do they do? If they are like a lot of Newtowners I’ve tried this on, they turn the plate so that the point of the pie faces them. The first bite is invariably that little point of pie, which some argue is the tastiest morsel. Whatever happened to saving the best for last?

I always save my best line for last in this column, which as you know is always…

Read me again.