During the COVID-19 pandemic, there has been a surge in online dating, with more people looking for a safe way to connect with others in a world of lockdowns, social distancing, and mask mandates.

The Wall Street Journal recently reported, “Overall, eight of the largest dating apps in the US saw a 12.6% year-over-year increase in monthly active users in the final quarter of 2020, the biggest such jump in nearly two years, according to data tracker Apptopia.”

Popular apps such as Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge allow users to create a profile within minutes and communicate with multiple people all from the comfort of their homes.

With that, though, is the reality that hundreds of strangers can view your public profile and the personal information it displays even if you do not match or choose to talk to them.

Newtown School Resource Officer William Chapman recommends that when people make their profile, they keep the information simple and relevant: first name, age, interests, and approximate location.

If a dating site allows you to set your location, he suggests using the closest large town or city, so as to not give your exact location. For example, if you live in Newtown, the location could be set to Danbury.

Be mindful that some apps require accessing your phone’s actual location in order to change your town and/or miles away as you travel in order to find potential matches near you. If you are traveling or in a place where you do not want people in the area to see your profile, some apps have a setting to allow your profile to be temporarily hidden.

While setting up your profile, Officer Chapman advises, “Avoid using your last name or specific date of birth. Leave identifiers like your home, family members, vehicle, or pets out of the photos that you post to the profile. These are good best practices for social media in general, dating or not.”

When it comes to trying to verify if the person you are talking to is really who they say they are, there are a few sleuthing options people can consider.

“Google is your best friend,” Officer Chapman said. “If you know ‘John’ is a physical therapist for example, there will likely some public information available. Open searches on Facebook or LinkedIn will also sometimes give information.”

For those who have the full name of the person they are talking to and want to know if they have a police record, the Connecticut Judicial website has several search resources at jud.ct.gov. To see if they are on the sex offender registry, visit portal.ct.gov/services/public-safety.

If at any point you feel unsafe while talking to someone through the dating site, Officer Chapman advises to stop talking to them and block them.

Many people feel like they may owe someone an explanation for wanting to part ways or brush off red flags as not a big deal, but it is in every user’s right to report someone making them uncomfortable.

Dating site users may also come across a situation where the person they are talking to quickly requests they stop using the app or website and continue their conversation through texting or another means of communication. It may seem harmless, but having someone make that request early on could mean they have ulterior motives.

Officer Chapman explained, “Stick to the app that you’re on. A common predatory tactic is to try to pull someone into an environment where the predator feels more comfortable and where there is less accountability. ‘I’d rather talk on Omegle,’ or ‘Come chat on Discord, it’s more fun,’ may be red flags.”

However, if this is proposed later into getting to know someone, it can be a natural part in developing a deeper relationship.

“If you are dating someone and it is going well and they are becoming a major part of your life, then you may want to engage with them on other social media platforms, but otherwise you should work within the features of the dating app you are on to communicate and get to know each other better,” Officer Chapman said.

Many dating apps have evolved over time to have additional means of communication rather than just texting. Some allow users to make phone calls and do video chats from the safety of the app without giving out personal telephone numbers or other account information.

Meeting In Person

As a variety of COVID-19 restrictions begin lifting statewide and COVID-19 vaccines become more accessible, many people are feeling hopeful about the idea of meeting in person for dates.

With that comes new situations to be mindful of regarding safety.

When selecting a location, it is important to find a public place where you will not be secluded alone with them.

Officer Chapman says restaurants and bars are typically good places for first dates, “because most bartenders and servers are very aware of dating dynamics [and] are not hesitant to help if you ask them.”

To get to the date, it may seem like a chivalrous gesture to drive together, but chose to travel separately.

“It is kind of them to offer to pick you up at home, but get to know them a little better first before giving them your address,” Officer Chapman said.

Another precaution people can take before meeting up with someone is to have a friend or family member know about the date.

“Tell a friend where you’re going and with who,” Officer Chapman said. “Have them set an alarm to check on you at a prescribed time. If your phone has the ability, you could allow them to see your location, too.”

Notifying someone about your whereabouts is beneficial, but it also does not hurt to have that person also be your pre-planned exit strategy if the date winds up making you uncomfortable.

“You could also invite a friend to meet you there at the end of an hour to set a more finite end to the date,” Officer Chapman said.

The strategy of setting a specific end time to a date has been adopted in a variety of forms — some people say they have an appointment to get to or that they have a rule of first dates only being a certain amount of time. This gives the person a safe out without having to confront someone that the date is not going well.

“Online dating is a perfectly reasonable way for us to make connections, but as with any online activity; we should proceed with caution, and if it is not adding to our life in a positive way, it may be time to give it a break,” Officer Chapman said.

Alissa Silber can be reached at alissa@thebee.com.