Cable By Kafka

To the Editor:

On 12/16/2011, I received a letter from my favorite cable company, Charter Communications, which stated in bold print: “Service Disconnect Pending, Avoid Service Disconnection,” and then ominously continued, “Unless you pay in full upon receipt, your account may be placed into our ‘Credit Risk’ category and service may be disconnected.”

What happened? About four weeks ago, I ordered an installation of a product called “Charter Telephone.” The installation was unsuccessful, but the next billing statement from this company included a 76 percent fee increase. Why? It took two calls to Charter customer service to clarify the issue. It turns out that the two-year contract price guarantee was removed from my billing statement, causing the fee increase. I was told I would receive a corrected invoice with the reduced amount. When I received a “Service Disconnect” notice instead, Charter told me that I should have paid the prior invoice in full (even though it was in error).

Furthermore, in response to my humble inquiry, the Charter agent “Jabe,” Charter ID 469, lightheartedly declared that had the prior invoice listed a $1 million amount, Charter would kindly offer $999 thousands-plus of credit. I immediately paid the overdue amount.

I would like to express my gratitude to Charter Communications for the prompt and thoughtful support. I am not going to compare my narrative to the stories from books of Franz Kafka, which even this brilliant writer could not recreate. Two days after my friendly conversation with Jabe, Charter called my home to once again offer me Charter Telephone service, despite the previously unsuccessful installation attempt. I declined their offer but it was, perhaps, a mistake because I may now receive a $1 million billing statement.

Woody Strzelecki

6 Settlers Lane, Sandy Hook                                 December 26, 2011