12/14 Survivors Convey Challenges, Ideas As Governor's Sandy Hook Panel Meets
The information being related Friday morning in the C.H. Booth Library meeting room could very well have represented keynote remarks for a symposium on handling victims of mass casualty disasters.
But it came with tears, hand-holding, fleeting video images of happy, dancing children, and the often wrenching testimony of several parents whose children were murdered on 12/14.
Governor Dannel Malloy’s Sandy Hook Advisory Commission held one of its final hearings just over a mile from the site of the 2012 tragedy on November 14, one month before the second anniversary of one of the nation’s worst school shootings.
For nearly two hours, many of its members including former Newtown lawmaker Chris Lyddy sat listening intently while Dr Jeremy Richman and Jennifer Hensel, parents of 6-year-old victim Avielle Richman, along with Nelba Marquez-Greene, the mother of 6-year-old Ana Marquez-Greene, detailed ways they believe Connecticut could improve response to incidents like the one Newtown faced on that fateful December morning 23 months earlier.
Hamden Mayor and Committee Chairman Scott Jackson opened the 9:30 am hearing warning members of the media in attendance to not engage the visiting parents, and that only committee members would be permitted to ask questions.
Just minutes after detailing their concerns with media representatives, however, several reporters ignored earlier warnings, approaching and engaging the parents before they were whisked away by commission members and local police officials.
The media was far from the only group that came under critical scrutiny by the surviving parents, however, as each read from pages of notes in their testimonies.
One by one, the parents ticked off observations and concerns about:
*charities using the names and images of their loved ones for fundraising without permission or authorization;
*questionable or unknown avenues of distribution for charity funds raised;
*the experience, qualifications, and skill sets of clergy and mental health responders who converged on the scene in the hours, days and months following the shootings;
*the status of private, state and federal grant money, some or most that had been reportedly earmarked for the immediate victims’ families needs, as well as for scholarships for surviving siblings;
*the lack of basic protocols for sequestering and communicating with the families of those killed as they arrived on scene and waited for news of their loved ones; and
*protecting the families of victims from overzealous reporters and camera crews who initially invaded the immediate triage areas, and later the homes, yards and neighborhoods of survivors.
At the same time, the parents speaking to commissioners on Friday drew from their professional training. Mr Richman and Ms Hensel are neuroscientists, and Ms Marquez-Greene is a licensed marriage and family therapist.
They provided advice, in part, suggesting the state employ a rapid response team of highly trained trauma experts that could provide the first line of support behind police and medical responders whose first responsibility is to secure and make mass casualty scenes safe.
A Brutal Reality
Dr Richman opened the testimony asking the question, “Who owns this tragedy?” And responding, “We all do.”
He then began explaining how survivors like he and his wife, should have access to a “victim-focused response.”
He, his wife and Ms Marquez-Green also revealed how friends, neighbors and the Newtown community have reacted to their devastation, sometimes making the victims feel like they were being segregated as a result of their tragic, shared experiences.
“We hear people say that, in crises like these, we have to grow used to the quote ‘new normal.’ I hate that expression,” Dr Richman said. “There is no normal. Nothing about this is so acceptable or appropriate to become normal. We can’t let it be that way.”
“Every day is like some hellish version of the movie Groundhog Day,” Ms Marquez-Greene said. “Every day is replete with pain, grief and loss, from the minute we take our first conscious breath in the morning, until the moment we go to bed. The reality of our day is brutal.”
Ms Hensel described the onslaught of apparently poorly vetted or unprepared immediate responders, even clergy members, who could neither cope with the immediate intensity, nor the protracted agony that resulted from the murders of 20 first grade students and their six educators on 12/14.
“Just because someone is part of a faith-based or mental health community does not make them qualified to be present at ground zero,” Ms Hensel said. “At first, the onslaught of help was akin to trying to drink water from a fire hose.”
Ms Hensel then talked about the lack of communication among professionals and agencies responding, or attempting to respond, to their families stating that almost two years had passed and she and her husband had just recently learned a state case worker had been assigned to assist them.
“A case worker never came to our door, we may have received an email but we don’t remember,” she said. “Everything was a haze in the immediate aftermath of this tragedy.”
Ms Marquez-Greene echoed concerns, explaining to the panel that the traumatized brain is subject to periods of forgetfulness and a lagging ability to realize and comprehend even basic information and interactions.
She admitted that she could not remember her own phone number for months following the death of her daughter. There was equal concern that even 23 months post-incident, inadequate resources are being made available for some survivors.
“The lives of the families who lost loved ones will never be the same,” she said, calling for an extended, focused mental health response not only for immediate victims, but for the teachers and students of Sandy Hook School.
“It is absolutely disheartening after 23 months, to hear of an impacted family with unmet needs,” Ms Marquez-Greene said. “That is a tragedy and should not be happening. Where is all the money going?”
Defined By The Tragedy
Toward the end of the session, several panelists expressed thanks for the parents’ candid testimony. Mr Lyddy asked the parents to talk about the work they dedicated themselves to as part of establishing a legacy in honor of their deceased children.
Dr Richman and Ms Hensel talked about how, as scientists, they sought to address and identify the scientific issues behind individuals who may be developing violent tendencies and attitudes.
Through their efforts, Dr Richman said new groundbreaking research is bridging biochemical and behavioral health sciences with a goal of identifying individuals who may be predisposed to violence.
Ms Marquez-Greene described several initiatives including establishing scholarships for incoming music students at Western Connecticut State University and the Artists Collective in Hartford. They also support an innovative curriculum on empathy with a “Love Wins” approach that is already showing positive behavioral and academic outcomes among students in a New Britain pilot program.
The parents also expressed a desire to be welcomed back into the arms of their Newtown community, understanding that coping with what their families are still going through is challenging for their neighbors and community members.
“Jeremy and I often hear ‘we will not be a town defined by this tragedy,” Ms Hensel said at one point during the testimony. “We are proud to be part of Newtown ... the town that will be part of the epicenter of change. But to be fair, we don’t have the luxury or the choice to say that we will not be defined by this tragedy.
“Every day we wake up to a day without our daughter,” she added. “Make no mistake, we are defined by this tragedy.”