It is a measure of how difficult life can be when we have to have regular reminders of the deep trouble people face with hunger, with their health, or with a host of other threats and dangers that transform ordinary lives into extraordinary ordeals. The reminder this week took the form of colorful neckwear as Governor Dannel P. Malloy promoted “Purple Tie Tuesday.” It was a focal point for a month he previously designated as Domestic Violence Awareness Month. The fashion statement may have been bright and upbeat, but the issue of domestic violence presents a dark and heavy burden to tens of thousands of victims and their families in Connecticut each year.

According to Connecticut’s Coalition Against Domestic Violence (CCADV), approximately 30,000 protective orders and 7,500 restraining orders are issued annually in Connecticut, and more than 54,000 victims seek services from the state’s 18 domestic violence community-based agencies each year. Domestic violence ruins families and lives in every town across the state, including Newtown. The Women’s Center of Greater Danbury, one of those 18 community agencies, serves Newtown. Its Executive Director Patricia Zachman reports that last year the center helped 1,466 individuals from Newtown with domestic violence, sexual assault, and outreach programs.

Homes are supposed to be protective places, but too often the most deadly threats roam the rooms. Already this year, 11 Connecticut residents have been killed by domestic violence, including four in a recent 15-day span. Sadly, many of those at risk do not know that help is available. The CCADV found that in the majority of domestic violence incidents that ended in death, the victims and their families were unaware of the programs and services that could have helped them.

A legislative task force is considering the establishment of statewide law enforcement models for responding to family violence and stricter enforcement of restraining and protective orders. And the Connecticut coalition is pushing for stricter penalties for violating those orders. But all the enforcement and judicial apparatus in the world won’t help if the people who most need help don’t know where to turn in an emergency.

Life can be very difficult, but we shouldn’t have to face the worst of it alone. If you are a victim of domestic violence, or know someone who is, help is a phone call away at 888-774-2900. Information and a network of support is on the other end of the line.