Experience Of A Lifetime

By Nancy K. Crevier

Regional Hospice of Western Connecticut is seeking volunteers to receive training at the next Family Volunteer Training Program at Regional Hospice’s Danbury office, 405 Main Street, October 5 and 6, from 9 am to 4 pm, and continuing on October 8, from 9 am to 1 pm. The 18-hour curriculum will include an overview of hospice and palliative care, how to be a supportive listener, the importance of respite in healthy caregiving, and an introduction to grief and loss.

“When a volunteer walks in the door it brightens our patients’ days,” said Carolyn Wolfe, the agency’s volunteer director, in a recent press release. “It can make such a difference to a family to know that someone will be there for a visit.”

Newtown resident Peggy Simonovich has been a hospice volunteer for one year. The recently retired nurse was seeking a way to fill her time when she discovered the Regional Hospice volunteer program. “You think if you are in the medical field, you know everything, but you don’t,” said Ms Simonovich. “With my work as a nurse, I had always felt like I wanted to be with patients more at the close of their lives, but the pressures of the job did not always allow it.”

Being a hospice volunteer has provided Ms Simonovich with excellent training so that she can offer respite to a dying individual’s family or just provide companionship, she said. The organization is also conscientious about matching volunteers and patients, being aware of each volunteer’s needs as well as the patients’, and providing on going classes for continuing education, she said.

“I find hospice work to be very peaceful,” Ms Simonovich said. “I look at it as a way to help somebody else’s next journey to wherever that may be. There is sadness, but you hope you made it easier for the individual and the family. You learn from every one,” she said.

The difference between witnessing his father’s death 30 years ago and his experiences as a hospice volunteer the past several months is “like night and day,” said Zach Taylor of Newtown. “My father suffered a lot when he was dying of lung cancer, and that had a big impact on me,” he said.

After retiring in 2007, he volunteered at Lockwood. “I loved it. When I saw an ad in the paper for hospice volunteers, I knew I could handle it,” Mr Taylor said.

The volunteer work at local nursing homes with terminal patients has given meaning to his life, he said. “I went into hospice training fearing my own mortality — I’m 72 years old — and this has gotten me past that.

“Sometimes I read to a patient, sometimes I just hold the individual’s hand and offer comfort, or I’m just there to sit by them and talk or laugh with them, if they want,” he said.

In a skilled nursing home situation, it is not uncommon for a person at life’s end to have no family or to not have family nearby, so Mr Taylor sees the solace that hospice volunteers offer to those people. “One patient said she was overwhelmed and had never had so much attention in her life. I get more than I give, every time,” Mr Taylor said.

“Hospice volunteering has been a good experience for me, but it’s not for everyone. The tremendous training sessions are a good way to find out if it is for you,” suggested Mr Taylor. “I’ve been lucky enough to be there at the end of someone’s life. There’s a great sense of satisfaction,” he added.

Comfort And Happiness

Lilla Dean’s experience with Regional Hospice stretches over five years. Also a retired nurse, like Ms Simonovich, Ms Dean decided after retirement that what she had seen of the organization over the years appealed to her, and she wanted to be a part of hospice care. The Regional Hospice training program was helpful in learning how to be in a client’s home without a clear “job” to do, she said.

“It’s the kind of heartfelt compassion you would give to any neighbor in a difficult situation,” explained Ms Dean, “but Hospice provides it with context and resources to help the family.”

She feels that volunteers such as herself contribute to an agreed upon goal of comfort and happiness in a person’s last months with the simple gifts and talents that they bring to the relationship. “Talk of death and dying is a very, very small part of what comes up. The individual often just needs a new audience for his or her life story — so you learn to be a good listener,” Ms Dean said. For one patient, it was helping her learn games of solitaire to pass the time. “She had never learned to play cards, and that’s what she wanted me to teach her. I feel good about what I bring to the families. I do what I can to contribute,” she said.

Regional Hospice has been a part of the greater Danbury area for more than 25 years. Its mission focuses on care, comfort, and compassion for those affected by terminal illness and loss. The agency serves the towns of Danbury, Ridgefield, Wilton, Redding, New Milford, New Fairfield, Bethel, Newtown, Brookfield, and Southbury.

An increasing need for hospice care means that there is a need for additional support volunteers. To explore becoming a Regional Hospice volunteer, contact Carolyn Wolfe, volunteer director, at 739-8315, or at Carolyn.Wolfe@danhosp.org; or Maureen Decker, volunteer coordinator, 739-8316, or at Maureen.Decker@danhosp.org. An application, interview, references, and background check are required. Registration for the upcoming training session will be accepted through September 25.