Wardrobe Consultant Gives Clients ‘Positive Reflections’

By Nancy K. Crevier

Pam Friedlander gets excited when her clients say that shopping with her is “like shopping with my best friend.” Ms Friedlander is a personalized wardrobe consultant and her business, Positive Reflections, is as much fun for her as she hopes it is for her clients, she said.

A former real estate agent in the Danbury area, Ms Friedlander turned her own life around by losing more than 60 pounds, changing her attitude, and starting her own business helping women, who like herself, had a skewed vision of their body image and style.

“I always had a knack for clothing, even when I was heavy, so I think that I understand [women of all sizes.] When I went from a size 14/16 to a size 6, I realized I was still dressing the same. It was time to change my attitude and my style,” she said. Even more so than when she was heavier, friends and acquaintances noticed that the new Pam Friedlander was looking stylish and put together in a way that they could not seem to master. “Women that I knew and women that they knew started asking my advice and urging me to turn my knack into a business,” she said.

In 2006, she did just that by starting Positive Reflections, and the response from the women that she meets through her Fashion Therapy Group Programs, corporate seminars, speaking engagements, and word of mouth has been tremendous. “I can help women of any size and any age wear something that will make them feel wonderful,” said Ms Friedlander.

Her typical client is a business woman or entrepreneur, such as the women at the recent Newtown Working Woman’s Forum where she spoke, who does not have the time to focus on her clothing choices, but needs to do so. “So when she goes to the office or to a function, she needs help. She might have a lot of things in her closet, but they may not be the right things, or she may not see how to put them together,” said Ms Friedlander. That is where her experienced eye comes into play.

Sophfronia Scott of Newtown, the editor of Done For You Writing, saw Ms Friedlander’s presentation at the Working Woman’s Forum and decided to use the consultant’s experience to revamp her neglected closet. A former editor of People Magazine’s Style Watch, she had a closet filled with wonderful clothes, but after having a baby and working from home, she lost confidence in her clothing choices.

“I often am asked to speak, or I meet with clients, and I just never felt I had the right outfit. Plus,” added Ms Scott, “I feel like I have a lot of ‘fit’ issues with my body.”

After a marathon five-hour session weeding through her closet, the women had pared down the selections to a number of outfits that could easily be updated with a few new accessories, jewelry, or shoes. A follow-up trip with Ms Friedlander to the Danbury Mall netted Ms Scott enough possibilities to make up for the years of neglect her wardrobe had suffered, she said.

“It was great. She picked out a lot of amazing things for me, including an awesome, killer purple jacket I never would have thought to buy. She made me a more savvy shopper,” said Ms Scott.

The extra plus, were all of the rave compliments she received when she attended her 25th high school reunion this summer. “Every single person commented on how great I looked. [Pam] gave me confidence to dress age-appropriately,” Ms Scott added.

Positive Reflections strives to help women see the “beautiful woman in the mirror” through a number of services. Beginning with a personal information questionnaire to help her understand a woman’s likes and dislikes, Ms Friedlander provides an analysis of clothing to complement a woman’s lifestyle, a present wardrobe critique, suggestions for color choices and styles to flatter an individual’s figure, and the creation of new outfits out of clothing already owned by her client.

For Ms Friedlander, being in front of a closet full of clothes is like being a child in a candy store. “I just love the possibilities. It’s almost like I open a closet and go into ‘the zone.’ I start pulling out this and that and zeroing in on what is right and what won’t work.”

She does not just look in a woman’s closet and make suggestions. This “best friend” does what your own best friend would do, if she had the time. She asks her client to try on one after another of the items from the closet, winnowing out the good, the bad, and the ugly. “We find pieces in the back of the closet that may be forgotten but can work in a way not thought of before,” she said “and we create a giveaway pile. That is sometimes hard to do, but I find that if I give a woman ‘permission’ to get rid of something, she can do it. When I leave, there is order to life. It makes getting ready each day easy.”

Certain pieces of clothing that no longer fit or are out of style may be “memory clothes,” and it is not necessary to give them the heave-ho, she said. “But you don’t need to keep them in the closet, either,” said Ms Friedlander, “where they take up room. We fold them up, and put them away.”

A Bag Of Tricks

As her client tries on outfits, Ms Friedlander pulls out her bag of tricks. “I always bring with me accessories, belts, shawls, even shoes to help a client see what can really pull an outfit together,” she said. Frequent trips to New York City and to fashion industry shows keep her own accessory selections updated.

After the initial two- to three-hour session rummaging in the closet, Ms Friedlander helps her client come up with a shopping list of essential items that should be purchased to round out the wardrobe. Her “must have” list includes the perfect black dress, a great pair of dress shoes or pumps, well-fitted slacks — “I find that petite women, especially, tend to buy clothes that are a little too big” — a blazer, a wrap dress or skirt, a crisp white blouse, knit tops, and jeans.

Her service goes even further, though. “If the client wants, we set up a shopping date to fill in those items that are missing,” she said. With firsthand knowledge of her clients likes and dislikes, budget, and style tastes in mind, Ms Friedlander does preliminary shopping the night before or the morning of the shopping date. She pulls clothes in sizes, styles, and colors that she believes will give her client the confidence she wants. “How a person feels about themselves is so important. I want my clients to love what they look like as much as I love what they look like. So many women have body issues. Once they start getting compliments using the outfits I have suggested, they start feeling better.”

With suggested clothing already prepulled and set aside at three or four different stores, together the client and Ms Friedlander try on, eliminate, and pull together pieces that work for the client. More than once, she has had a client tell her she feels like the Julia Roberts character in Pretty Woman, transformed from drab to fabulous.

Three years ago, Newtown resident Terry Laslo took advantage of Ms Friedlander’s shopping service, and to this day she keeps in mind the tips and shopping skills she learned, whenever she goes shopping.

A web designer, Ms Laslo works at home, but meeting with clients means having a polished look. “I needed to update my look, and really didn’t know how. I hate to shop and I am not a ‘clothes’ person,” said Ms Laslo. She had met Ms Friedlander through her business, and decided that a wardrobe consultant might be just what she needed.

“She took me into stores I would never have gone into by myself, because I thought they weren’t my style or not in my price range. What she did was to help me navigate the stores, and learn how to discriminate and pick out what works for me,” said Ms Laslo.

Initially, Ms Laslo worried that she might turn into a carbon copy of the consultant. “She looks great, but her style is different from mine. That didn’t happen though. She really took me into consideration,” she said.

Finding the right shoes and slacks that fit right are frequent complaints that Ms Friedlander hears. “The shoe can make or break an outfit, so if they are frumpy or outdated, I will suggest a style that is as beautiful as it is comfortable. With slacks, I often tell women that you have to let a tailor be your friend when necessary. It is hard to buy right off the rack,” she said.

With a wardrobe of versatile pieces and the right accessories, a woman feels a sense of pride, said Ms Friedlander, and getting ready for any event is no longer a frustrating experience. “I feel good when I know that you look good.”

Ms Friedlander is available for speaking engagements, image and wardrobe consultation, personal shopping, fashion therapy group programs, and corporate seminars. Contact her at 798-0718 or 733-9328, or visit posreflections.com for more information.