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FROM THE CASE FILES OF DETECTIVE LASLO BRISCOE: Installment 19

By Andrea Zimmermann

No. 1050 -- The Case

Of The Inept Auto Thieves

With two constables in town bearing the name Beers, it seems the smart thief

would aim for a target other than G. Herbert Beers. But youth will out, and

the arrogant rogues of Wednesday morning are lucky not to have a load of

buckshot lodged in their hides.

When Beers was awakened in the early hours of the morning, he happened to look

out and see five men pushing his car out of his garage with the intent to make

away with it. Beers removed his trusty gun from its rack and opened fire.

Although his fire didn't graze any of the bandits, the sound of the shots sent

them fleeing down a road that would send them straight to jail.

After unloading his gun, Beers telephoned me, as he knows I am up at all

hours. I immediately called constables Hiram Hanlon and Preston Beers, and the

three of us were off to find our men.

We came upon two walking on the road heading out of Hawleyville; the others

were about four miles farther along on their journey. But they must have been

tired, having had such a busy night. We found Representative Honan's truck

full of groceries on the road just before spying the culprits. It seems they

had also attempted to steal it but then decided to abandon the vehicle.

No. 1063 -- The Case

Of Burglars On The Rampage

When we turned the calendar to the new year, local merchants hoped the tide of

crime would turn, too. But 1994 dawned to yet another burglary. And if a

burglar is cunning and successful, why would the expectation ever arise that

he might quit that which brings him easy wealth or preferred goods?

But try to introduce such logic where concern reigns and the argument will

fall on deaf ears. That is most likely the reason why none of the involved

parties has asked for my assistance until today. The discovery of last night's

robbery -- the third in four weeks -- has moved the merchants from wishing to

action.

To recapitulate recent events:

December 6, 1932, money was stolen from H.G. Warner's store during the night.

The robbers carried away between $30 and $40 in pennies and silver.

It is believed the culprits secreted themselves somewhere in the store at

closing and spied on Warner as he hid the money in two places. Then, when all

was quiet, they retrieved the coinage and fled.

No goods were molested; the thieves knew exactly what they were after.

The robbers departed by way of the cellar door.

December 21, another robbery was affected, but this time at the First National

Store in Sandy Hook.

Robbers entered between midnight and one o'clock and made way with a large

quantity of cigars and cigarettes valued at $95.

They entered by prying open the front door of the establishment -- a bold

maneuver as the night lights were burning.

Al Knapp happened by and noticed the open doors. He notified the manager,

Richard Carmody, of Sandy Hook.

The bandits must have greatly enjoyed their smoke because they were to return

to the First National Store January 4, and remove $10 or $20 worth of tobacco

and cigarettes. This time, however, it was the rear door that was jimmied

open.

I am of the mind these are rather astute, well practiced burglars. The last in

this rash of burglaries was perpetrated about the time the Masonic lodge was

in session -- all those cars parked about the First National Store was the

perfect screen for such untoward activity. If I were not bound by my

profession to further and maintain the laws of society, I would admit

admiration for this style of thieves. They strike with a purpose and are not

greedy; thence, they limit their take and make a quick get away.

No. 1089 -- The Case

Of The Stilled Still

Constables Wesley Stanton and Hiram Hanlon joined with men from the Ridgefield

Barracks to bring sobering charges against four Danbury men they arrested

December 21 in Botsford. There the officers found a 300-gallon still in

operation, several gallon cans of alcohol, and other paraphernalia for making

alcohol. The men -- villains to some, heroes to others -- pleaded guilty to

manufacturing alcohol and transporting it, keeping it with the intent to sell

and were fined $100 to the first set of charges and $50 to the latter charge.