Date: Fri 16-Jul-1999

Publication: Bee

Author: JAN

Quick Words:

Hospice-Lynn-O'Brien

Full Text:

Regional Hospice Director Is Stepping Down

(with photo)

BY JAN HOWARD

Madeline "Lynn" O'Brien of Newtown has been, in her words, "doing Hospice" for

20 years in different capacities. Because of that, her involvement probably

won't end when she steps down as executive director of Regional Hospice of

Western Connecticut in Danbury to move to the Philadelphia area with her

husband, Paul.

Hospice has been part of her life with each move she has made, from her days

as an oncology nurse to her recent three-year stint at the Regional Hospice.

"I am open to any purpose God can use me," Mrs O'Brien said this week. "When

you do God's work, to love others, He'll find a spot for you."

"She is an extremely important part of what Hospice is," said Donna Ramey of

Newtown, president of the Hospice Board of Directors when Mrs O'Brien was

hired. "When she called about being a volunteer, I said `Let's interview this

lady.'

"She is very passionate about Hospice care, and you know how much it means to

her. She is very spiritual," Ms Ramey continued. "We needed a new direction,

and she took us there. She gave us visibility and the credibility to be a

strong and caring agency for this community."

Ms Ramey said Mrs O'Brien became director shortly after the agency's

affiliation with Danbury Health Systems. Under her direction, Hospice rooms at

Danbury Hospital and a separate children's bereavement center, which is unique

to the local Hospice, will soon reach fruition.

"She brought the board to a tremendous next level," Ms Ramey said. "We did a

good job, but it was time to be more professional. Lynn has helped with the

interaction between the board and staff and made us realize the true meaning

of Hospice.

"Our mission will never change, but we have a direction now because of Lynn,"

she said. "She was a tremendous asset to us. It's hard to see her go,

professionally and as a friend."

Mrs O'Brien was working as an oncology nurse in South Carolina during the

early years of Hospice. She found herself reading and learning everything she

could about the program that provides a special kind of care for dying people

and their families and care givers.

"I felt it was a program the community needed to know more about," Mrs O'Brien

said. She began talking about Hospice to every group she could.

"I found a gift I never knew existed," she said. "I was gifted by God to talk

about Hospice, and having people listening to me is a powerful thing to me."

In the spring of 1979, the South Carolina Baptist Hospital in Columbia called

upon Mrs O'Brien as the local expert on Hospice to set up a program, arrange

for volunteers, and train a staff. She worked on it for a year, and got the

doors open before moving to Memphis, Tenn.

Once in Memphis, she received another call, this time from Methodist Hospital,

which had learned about her past experience, to develop its Hospice program.

She served as the hospital's director of home care and hospice for four years.

Following a move to Houston, Tex., Mrs O'Brien served as director of education

for a local hospital and became a Hospice volunteer in her community.

Then came a move to Westfield, N.J. She served for eight years as director of

Hospice at Overlook Hospital in Summit.

"Then I thought I retired," she said. "We came to Connecticut for a more

relaxed way of life."

Once settled in Newtown, however, she called Regional Hospice to again become

a volunteer only to be offered the position of executive director. For the

first time she would be working with an established Hospice.

"I have a program that had reached into the community and have taken it to a

different level. That will be my legacy," she said.

She said she is proud that she has been able to make local communities more

understanding of what Hospice can provide for end-of-life care and comfort.

"I've talked to many organizations about care for the dying," Mrs O'Brien

said. "Something rings true to these people. We Americans don't want to talk

about dying. Death and dying is a hard talk to have with people."

Mrs O'Brien was also able to clear up misconceptions about Hospice, such as

when it should be used. "Hospice enters as people want it to. The patient is

included in the choices of services and what we can offer them. Hospice

teaches the family ways to improve care.

"I'm proud of my involvement in a team of people, staff and volunteers, who

provide a level of care I only talk about on a daily basis," she said.

She is also proud that Hospice has continued to be able to support itself,

through grants and fundraisers, so it can continue to provide quality care and

so that the first question asked of a patient never has to be "What is your

insurance?"

She received her training at the Walter Reed Army Institute of Nursing during

the Vietnam era and her degree from the University of Maryland. She then spent

three years of active service with the US Army in San Antonio, Tex. and later

in Heidelberg, Germany, where she met her husband at the officers club. The

couple married after she was discharged from the Army.

She then pursued her master's degree in oncology at the University of South

Carolina.

Hospice is not just for cancer patients, however, Mrs O'Brien explained. "It

is for the end stages of any illness, the last six months of life.

"Ninety percent of Americans would choose to die at home," she said. However,

"Eighty-five percent are dying in institutions. Hospice makes dying at home

possible. Hospice is the way to have end-of-life care better in the home."

Mrs O'Brien is proud of Hospice's Bereavement Center for Children and

Families, which was established in 1995.

"Under my direction, we are establishing a separate, free-standing facility

designed for children," Mrs O'Brien said. As well as a place where groups can

meet, it will serve as a community education resource center for teachers and

others to learn more about how to address a child's bereavement.

She is currently working on moving the children's bereavement center to a

house on Danbury's former Down on the Farm property. The proposal has passed

zoning and is now headed for planning.

"I'm encouraged and excited that it can become reality in 2000," she said. "It

will be an off-site facility, with a homelike setting. It will be a place

where children will feel supported and can share painful, intimate feelings."

The center serves all children, not just those whose parents are in the

Hospice program, she said. It is especially important for those who have lost

a parent through some catastrophe, "when they had no time to prepare," she

added.

According to Mrs O'Brien, the center follows families in bereavement for 14

months through peer and support groups for children and teens as well as for

parents or guardians, and services and mailings.

"Children carry that loss forever. They think about it in everything they do,"

she said, because the parent is not there to share in important events.

Regional Hospice was incorporated in 1983 and serves Danbury and adjacent

towns. Mrs O'Brien said Newtown is next to Danbury in the number of people it

serves. There are about 35 Newtown volunteers.

"We have wonderful volunteers," she said. "Hospice is a celebration of life.

The volunteers and staff make my job easy."

Mrs O'Brien will spend her final weeks working with the new executive

director, Emily Giannattacio of Mahopac, N.Y., who begins work on July 12. She

was formerly director of Hospice at Calvary Hospital in Westchester County.

In addition to her work with Hospice, Mrs O'Brien has been co-chairman of the

Ethics Committee of Danbury Hospital for two years.

"I have felt a sense of belonging in this community, Danbury and Newtown," Mrs

O'Brien said. "They have been very significant in the crossing of my life's

journey. I am leaving behind many good relationships and have many memories."