The next time you feel like complaining, remember that your garbage disposal probably eats better than 30 percent of the people in the world.

––Robert Orben

Never eat more than you can lift.

––Miss Piggy

Always take a good look at what you’re about to eat. It’s not so important to know what it is, but it’s critical to know what it was.

––anonymous

Before eating, always take time to thank the food.

––Arapaho Proverb

Don’t take a butcher’s advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he’d be a chef.

––Andy Rooney

Never serve oysters in a month that has no paycheck in it.

––P.J. O’Rourke

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick –– not wounded –– dead.

––Woody Allen

A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety.

––Aesop

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you.

––Nora Ephron

My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.

––Henny Youngman

There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted.

––Judith Martin, “Miss Manners”

A food is not necessarily essential just because your child hates it.

––Katharine Whitehorn

(Each week this column features quotations gleaned from the readings and experiences of our editors, reporters, readers, and friends. All are invited to submit quotations for inclusion here. They may be sent to Gleanings, c/o The Newtown Bee, 5 Church Hill Road, Newtown, CT 06470 or emailed to editor@thebee.com.)