Note To A Thief

To the Editor:

This is to whom it may concern.

Please stop taking the ornaments from our front yard. I’d like for the cat flag to be returned that you stole last summer. I was please to learn that our neighborhood watch was working when our neighbor chased you and your SUV out of our driveway while you were tearing out our year-old Forsythia bushes. I presume you where going to plant them in your own yard. Now that’s what I call pride of ownership. I only wish I was the one who was doing the chasing.

As of last weekend, our latest request is that our pair of driveway reflectors be returned. And while you are returning the reflectors, do collect the numerous empty gin and vodka bottles that are lining the roadway in our neighborhood.

Concerned Citizen,

Diana O’Neill

28 Washbrook Road, Newtown                                      May 28, 2003