The approximately 30 attendees of a presentation at Newtown Senior Center learned recently that social isolation of older residents of most communities is a big concern.

According to data shared during “Where’s Waldo: There Are No Strangers, Just Friends You Haven’t Met Yet,” 25% of those age 65 and older are considered socially isolated. Further, 37% of those ages 50-80 experience loneliness and 34% feel socially isolated. The program, co-presented by Newtown Social Services and Friends of Newtown Seniors (FONS), was offered as a Lunch & Learn on January 31.

Social Services Director Natalie Griffith, Newtown Social Worker Alexa Griffin, and FONS Board Members John Boccuzzi and Ned Simpson took turns speaking during the brief presentation, which was followed by brainstorming among the tables and potential solutions.

Griffith credited Boccuzzi for moderating a recent FONS Roundtable — a monthly event usually moderated by Simpson that invites local residents to discuss issues pertaining to senior life in town — concerning social isolation as the impetus for the senior center event.

“The discussion coming from that group, we thought, was so powerful and helpful, we wanted to bring it to the larger senior center community, see if we could get some good participation and help us identify some strategies to help decrease social isolation in our community,” she explained.

Griffin introduced some of the health implications linked to loneliness, which include everything from high blood pressure, heart disease, obesity, a weakened immune system, anxiety and depression to cognitive decline, Alzheimer’s disease, and death.

“The statistic we have is 56% of older adults experiencing chronic loneliness have a higher risk of stroke,” she also noted. “So this affects the heart and vascular system, and these are all health-related implications of feeling lonely at times, or socially isolated.”

The presentation wasn’t all negative, fortunately.

“I’m not sure if you’ve ever heard, though, that being around people you love, getting hugs from people that you love, actually builds your immune system,” Griffin shared, before then listing some of the lifestyle challenges that contribute to loneliness. Among those are caregiving, responsibilities that often take precedence over personal needs, little time or energy to nurture a social life, health challenges, retirement and the resulting loss of workplace interactions, and downsizing and/or relocation to unfamiliar communities.

“Retirement is a huge one,” she said. “If you are going from working five days a week, 40 hours a week, to having the wonderful opportunity to retire, but not replacing that with other social interaction, that is a huge change.”

Similarly, the move into an entirely new neighborhood, before meeting new neighbors and learning what is in the area, “that can definitely lead to loneliness,” she cautioned.

A few days earlier, local counselor Bob Schmidt presented “Don’t Wanna Be All By Myself.” While the focus of that program was on navigating grief and loss, it also covered coping with loneliness. Boccuzzi reiterated one of the Schmidt’s suggestions during his talk.

“Remember, one of the things he emphasized was self-care. You’ve got to make sure you take time to take care of yourself,” he said.

Community Health Needs Assessments are “currently going on now at our local hospital,” he then said. “Danbury Hospital is doing an assessment of community health needs, and they have identified key challenges through systematic, comprehensive data collection and analysis. They’ve done that — they’ve got tremendous amounts of data.”

According to data analyzed by Nuvance Health and shared during the “Lunch & Learn: Where’s Waldo?” the prevalence of Newtown residents who say they always/usually/sometimes feel socially isolated is 30.4%. For Sandy Hook, the number increases to 30.8%.

Regionally, the numbers were very similar: Bethel was 32%; Brookfield, also 30.4%; Danbury, 35%; New Fairfield, 31.1%; Redding, 28.3%; Ridgefield, 29.1%; and Sherman, 28.5%. The data was from the CDC Pieces 2022 Behavioral Risk Factor Surveillance System.

“The challenge,” Boccuzzi said, “is that capturing data on social isolation is inherently challenging. Obviously it’s hard for us to get all the information. We’d like to reach some of these people who are isolated, and we’re hopeful you can help us with suggestions.

“Maybe if you could help us get in contact with them — or certainly Social Services, who are professionals — that would be a huge help in bringing people out of that social isolation,” Boccuzzi said.

Griffin agreed, saying it is often the people who are isolated who do not respond to surveys. Other ways to find those people are needed, she said.

What Is ‘Social Isolation’?

Returning to the first data shared that afternoon, Simpson asked those in the room to again consider the percentage of people who feel socially isolated. Using the definition of a person age 60 and older as a “senior citizen,” Simpson said there “is something in the neighborhood” of 7,000 senior citizens currently living in Newtown.

“If you think about this crowd,” he said, gesturing around the room, “and this is a great crowd of people in that bracket, you are an infinitesimal percentage of the seniors in town. Where are the other seniors, and are they living a life as full as can be expected?”

As he spoke, a brief questionnaire was passed out to everyone. Simpson asked everyone to think about friends, neighbors and acquaintances, and whether any of them were socially isolated.

“Think about your neighbors, and how often you see them. Think about people you used to see at church, or people who used to be in your club, who you don’t see any longer,” he said. “I don’t think anyone in this room is isolated. You’re here. You’re out. What about those other people though?”

One attendee asked for clarification about the afternoon’s subject. She has a neighbor, she said, who does not leave her home very often due to medical challenges, “but she’s on the phone all the time.

“Is she isolated?” the woman asked Simpson. He wasn’t sure how to answer that, he admitted.

Another attendee said he felt a person can self-isolate even if they go to church, or the senior center, or other locations that encourage people to interact.

“You can be isolated if you’re not communicating with the people there,” he said.

Simpson and Boccuzzi both said it was “a good point.” Simpson said both examples were good, but he and the others were more concerned with people “who never get out. They may not have family in town, or for 100 miles, and the question is: are they isolating themselves, or is there something the community is not providing them? Are we not being a community to them?”

Returning to the questionnaire, Simpson asked the group to consider the following questions: Have you ever tried to engage with someone you considered lonely? Did you find these conversations challenging and if so, how? What are the resources you would recommend to someone suffering from loneliness or isolation?

Those seated among the tables were also encouraged to consider support systems needed to combat loneliness and isolation, and how to find individuals within Newtown who are isolated.

Thoughts And Discussion

After approximately 10 minutes of open discussion, Simpson asked for feedback.

The first person to speak said he and others at his table had a difficult time relating to those who are socially isolated.

“If you do get out, like so many of us here do, and join a club or a group, it’s hard to reach out to those who don’t do the same,” he said. “You need to know someone pretty well to make an assessment.”

One woman at the neighboring table felt similarly.

“We feel many people get to a certain age and just don’t want to go out,” she said, adding a couple of the people at the table “had really tried to get someone out, and they just are not interested.”

One other point raised by the table, however, was encouraging.

“We felt that if you could get close enough to that neighbor, as opposed to just walking up there without any relationship, then they might be more posed to accepting you, listening, and maybe doing something. I thought that was a good idea,” she said.

At the next table, the first woman to speak said people don’t always give a reason for not wanting to get out of their home.

“I was lucky,” she said. “My daughter told me about this place. She encouraged me to visit, and it’s been a life saver.”

Conversely, the next woman to speak admitted she is upset with a friend she has repeatedly invited to join her at the senior center, only to be turned down.

“Her regular response is ‘It’s not for me,’” the woman said. “For me, the only time I don’t want to go out is when I am physically unable to go somewhere.”

For some it’s the stigma attached to a senior center. One woman said her elderly sister has told her she “does not want to go to any senior center. She portrays it as old people just sitting around.” Nodding, the man next to her said his mother has said she doesn’t “want to be associated with those old farts.”

The comments drew laughter, nodding heads, and a few people saying they’ve heard similar comments from people they have invited to join them.

Another attendee raised the idea that some people purposely isolate.

“I’m questioning how many of these people who have isolated themselves have always been that way,” she said. “They would go to work, go home, and lots of people that I’ve talked to did nothing beyond that.”

Nearby one man agreed.

“It’s easy to stay home,” he said. “It’s easy to hang out in your sweatpants and not take a shower and go out and play some pool with the guys. It’s easy to just do your thing, and eat what you want.”

Simpson agreed.

“I can assure you, for some people the Meals on Wheels deliveries are the only people some people see,” he said. “There’s also the physical challenge for some people to just get up and go out. What do we do for them?”

The overwhelming response to that question was outreach and communication. Suggestions were made of placing the senior center’s monthly newsletter in additional public locations around town, or sending them with meal deliveries. Copies of the just-published February 2025 newsletter were all over the room that afternoon.

“I know it would be expensive,” said one woman, holding up her copy of the newsletter, “but it’s beautiful and there’s so much going on here. I don’t know if people realize how much is going on here.”

Another woman suggested a video monitor with an ongoing slide show featuring photos from senior center events. Another person thought senior center commercials could be added to pre-film advertising at Edmond Town Hall.

“I think you have to change your marketing,” they said. “There’s a stigma. Flip it to the positive. I don’t think we market ourselves right.”

Simpson pointed out The Newtown Bee has a Senior News column every week.

“It’s right there, in front of everyone who reads that paper,” he said.

One woman suggested finding a way to send the paper to more people.

“It’s a quintessential source of information,” she said. “I don’t think I could function without reading that thing, page to page, every week. As generous as this town is, I really think that would be a good fundraiser to do.

“We could combine getting the paper to people, with a sticker on the paper encouraging them to also visit the senior center,” she said.

Outreach will begin soon for new senior center members. Griffith said new volunteer efforts are launching at 8 Simpson Street, including a Sunshine Committee.

“We’ll have volunteers reach out to new members. When somebody signs up to be a new member, they’ll get a phone call from a fellow member, welcoming them and asking them if they have any questions.

“They’ll ask if they would like to meet, maybe for coffee, because we do think that could be a real barrier,” she continued. “People who make the first step and sign up might not walk back through the door because they see people are already engaged with each other, or they don’t know how to sign up for a fitness class, or they don’t want to jump into a new group on their own. We’re hoping that will create a really nice bridge for people.

“Some people may not want that engagement,” she said, “but at least we’ll offer.”

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Managing Editor Shannon Hicks can be reached at shannon@thebee.com.