Jesse McCord Lewis: Honoring And Remembering
December 14, 2017, will mark five years without loved ones for families of children and educators killed at Sandy Hook Elementary School. The Newtown Bee will share remembrances of victims of 12/14 throughout the fall, written by family members or with the assistance of staff at The Newtown Bee. Not all families are yet ready to share with Newtown friends and neighbors, and we respect that. This week, Scarlett Lewis has worked with Bee reporter Eliza Hallabeck to share her love and loss of her son, Jessie McCord Lewis.
Nearly five years ago, 6-year-old Jesse McCord Lewis wrote the words "nurturing, healing, love" on a chalkboard at his mother's home. They were scrawled in white chalk in first grade handwriting. Days later, he was murdered in his classroom at Sandy Hook Elementary School.
.The Jesse Lewis Choose Love Movement was created in March 2013 in honor of Jesse, to create "a more peaceful world by raising awareness that everyone can choose love in any circumstance; to ensure every child has access to the essential life skills that will empower them to Choose Love, and to help facilitate this by teaching these skills within their families, schools, and communities," a description of the foundation reads on its website,
Since its creation, communities worldwide have embraced its message of "choosing love." The Choose Love Movement's free, prekindergarten to twelfth grade comprehensive social and emotional learning program, called the Choose Love Enrichment Program, has been downloaded in 47 states and 17 countries since its launch in August 2016.
Seeing the positive influence her son Jesse Lewis has had on other communities has given his mother Scarlett Lewis comfort. The tremendous bravery he showed during his last minutes on earth continues to fuel her own courage.
"I get to share Jesse and his story with communities throughout the world," said Ms Lewis.
The foundation has become part of the solution, Ms Lewis said, by making the world a safer, more peaceful, and loving place. Following Jesse's murder, Ms Lewis said she looked at the issues schools face. Those issues are mirrored in society. She researched current programs in schools and looked at data showing which ones are effective, and those that are not. The answer, she found, was in social and emotional learning strategies. Teaching children coping skills, how to be resilient, and how to make healthy connections is just part of the effort.
She found that bullying rates continue to increase since incidents began being tracked in 2003, despite mandated programs designed to tackle the issue, according to the National Center for Education Statistics. She found that despite suicide prevention efforts, the United States has more suicides than murders. Substance abuse is skyrocketing despite state-mandated awareness programs. As a whole, "Our efforts to reduce these issues are not working," Ms Lewis concluded.
"And we have the solution; it is called social and emotional learning," she said. Social and emotional learning is the foundation of the Choose Love Movement Program.
She began working with a group of "incredibly dedicated and talented educators" to create an evidenced-based program that includes emotional intelligence, character education, positive psychology, mindfulness, and neuroscience.
"It is my personal mission in life now... to make sure that every child has access to [this] life-saving and life-transforming program," said Ms Lewis.
The program does not require teacher preparation or training. Instead, teachers learn along with their students. The program is based on a powerful formula for choosing love: "Courage, Gratitude, Forgiveness, and Compassion in Action = Choosing Love."
"I realized we can't wait for someone else to solve these problems," said Ms Lewis. "We must take responsibility for what is happening to children in our world and be an active part of the solution."
The social and emotional skills taught through the Jesse Lewis Choose Love Movement are not innate; however, they are easy to teach, and easy to learn, at any age.
"My passion comes from the fact that social/emotional learning would have saved lives on December 14, 2012, as well as preventing so much future suffering," said Ms Lewis. Her life's motivation is also fueled by the accompanying pain of the loss of her beloved son.
The tragedy, she said, started with an angry thought in the shooter's head. He did not have the coping skills and emotional intelligence to handle the pain he was feeling. "Adam was not born a mass murderer," Ms Lewis said. Social and emotional learning would have prevented the tragedy, she said, by not only giving the shooter insight, but also, those around him.
"There are decades of research showing the benefits of social and emotional learning for our children," according to Ms Lewis. Social and emotional learning is the most effective way to have a safe school environment, kind and caring culture, and is also the most proactive and preventative mental health initiative available.
"Rather than focusing on the issues, social and emotional learning proactively prevents the problems before they start by giving students the skills, tools, and understanding they need," said Ms Lewis.
Ms Lewis says we know this type of program offers students an optimal chance of having a purposeful and meaningful life.
Sharing that the program has been used in countries like Malawi and Uganda, Ms Lewis said, "It is so powerful, and it makes sense because we are spreading love. Love is what connects us all as human beings. We all want to love and be loved. A lot of what we are seeing in our society is simply from lack of love. I will continue my mission until every child has access to social and emotional learning."
While she finds tremendous joy from what she does, the joy is always coupled with loss. It both hinders and spurs her on to make sure school shootings are not "our new normal."
Her hope for Jesse's legacy is "the foundation will continue to inspire, and transform lives for years to come."
In her book Nurturing Healing Love, Ms Lewis wrote about her journey of hope and forgiveness during the first six months following the tragedy. With her book, and in seminars and presentations and on her website, and worldwide, she invites people to join the global movement to choose love. One way to choose love is to consciously choose a loving thought over an angry thought, each day. Through the ripple effect, she said, this will make the world a safer, more peaceful, and loving place.
) to enable orphan genocide survivors in Rwanda to attend college. JT initiated this to return the love and kindness he received from them following the tragedy of losing his little brother.Ms Lewis said her faith in God has been her "guide post," and her family has been an amazing source of support. Jesse's older brother, JT Lewis, started an organization called Newtown Helps Rwanda (
"His healing of himself through his efforts in healing others has been a tremendous inspiration in my life," said Ms Lewis, "and an example of the power of compassion in action."
Ms Lewis frequently shares a message Jesse left for his big brother JT shortly before he was murdered. JT found the note folded up on his desk and in carefully printed letters it said, "Have a Lot of fun."
"To honor Jesse on the fifth anniversary of his murder, JT and I would ask everybody to, 'Have a Lot of fun,'" said Ms Lewis.